## Resilient Koan 09 - Fullness and Emptiness ### Koan: Something like "How do you know when the cup of opportunity is full, before you start to pour?" ### Context: As you engage with someone or thing, you may perceive there are opportunities to share knowledge, support growth, learn and play together. The perception of the size of the cup, the size of the opportunity you perceive will be affected by your own motivations and not necessarily attentive to the actual need. If the rate, volume and type of energy and knowledge you pour into that system or relationship may be too little (dissatisfaction), too great (overwhelm) or just right. ### Insight: The cup is not static, and a bigger cup can be built. Humans and systems develop over time, containing and perceiving increasing complexity. Occasionally cups also break, perhaps through the force of the content pouring in to them being too great, or those handling the cup being careless. If you the content you provide suits the tastes and is not poured too fast, the cup could be built upon to take more content. But that can't be done if the cup is overflowing. ### Inquiry: My teachers and peers have often shown the restraint to enable me to grow and develop at a pace that is healthy. The pour into me only when asked, and observe, waiting until I ask for more. When teaching and engaging in others, I notice when the content I provide or the energy with which it is offered leads to their cups overflowing and none of it being savoured. If other's cup (capacity to handle content) is smaller than the volume of tea, or I don't have the tea they prefer (the knowledge or experience they seek) then the only motivation for pouring is some sort of egoic seeking of self affirmation that what I have is valued. It's better for everyone, for the health of the community that you just seek out some other audience to which to offer your gifts. If offering those gifts and engaging in that experience is what I require to develop and grow my own container of consciousness, then there will be a tension created. Talking to a new friend this week, she had experienced the tension and sadness from living and working in a context where all that she was and could offer was simply not recognised, and so her sense of self and her gifts diminished. When participating in or leading experiences that are 'state' altering, the size of ones cup can expand infinitely and all content can be considered. For example, after ten days of meditation the depth and breadth of my consciousness is almost infinite. However, I will still filter the information based on my stage of development, and breadth of my attention, and it is likely that all the content I could handle during the experience will spill out and be lost if practices are not maintained to build my container within the scaffolding of the experience. Even this inquiry and the metaphor I have used are constructed and restricted within the relative container of my consciousness and not the ultimate emptiness of the absolute. Perhaps if this metaphor was with pints and beer, the link to state experiences would be more direct - drinking and drinking yourself into a stumbling state where you can't remember the content the next day, but just remember you had a great time! ### Resolution: How can you begin to pour if you are not offering tea and offering a service? How could one pour if their is no customer who has requested tea? Why would you continue to pour if the recipient of your offerings has not savoured the flavour and asked for more? Why? Perhaps because all you want to do, in your own silly way, is share all that you are, all that you know, all that you love. ### Practice: Only pour tea and offer your gifts when someone asks. Don't pour too much and make a mess, for someone has to clean up and the drinker will not appreciate what you have poured. If there is the opportunity to support cup-building, then make sure the container is sufficiently strong to handle the hot tea, otherwise the shoddy construction will probably result in a mess. Restraint is not some false humility rather a genuine interest in engaging in a way that is appropriate, respectful and conducive to further engagement and growth. And, if you really need to pour, then go find someone who cares for what you have to offer! --- This is one in a series of 25 'Resilient Koans' documenting "an apithologue into the koans of practice discovered while creating resilient sustainable communities", in 2010.